Become a Spaceholder

Dear team,

Last Sunday I was at Waking Life festival in Portugal, just after the Heal From School Lab. I had been invited to deliver a Rage Club.

40 people showed up or they were already there napping after the last workshop. The people were tired.

I started with context and low level anger. Then pushing shoulders.

When I took some questions/sharings, one person said they were scared to go higher than 20-30% anger in that position. I mentioned there were other positions that would make it safe for her to experience anger even up to 100% without hurting herself or/and others, and described the position. A few people asked if they could do or see that, so I arranged for a demonstration.

A man volunteered and we did a floor rage process with 5 men holding him. He did 30 seconds and had no words, we paused, there was feedback and coaching and he went again and now there were some words and a very clear NO! I asked him who was he talking to and eventually he said hi mother. I held space for him to find a real boundary, and we did standing rage with two men holding him and a woman chosen by him to be his mother.

He went up to 70% and spoke in his native tongue, greek. At the end of the process we clapped and I looked at my watch and a whole 1h10 had passed in my 1h30 session.

The woman was crying. She shared that her son says exactly the same thing. They shared a hug and were crying profusely. I look around the room and about 15 people are crying. They had not left. I took sharings of what was alive in the people and offered a distinction, or a listening space, or a possible practice.

The space ended with me landing the distinction Feelings vs. Emotions and what an Emotional Healing Process is.

I never had that many people asking me for a postcard after a workshop! I am almost all out!

Hello Team,

I was doing a Rage and Rage-Yoga Festival tour in East Germany during the month of July. One of my golds is that one participant asked me after the Rage space "Are you delivering Rage Clubs in Dresden?" And I told her that if she found 5 people then I would come. Two weeks later she wrote me "I got 5 women, when can you come?". So we're now together planning a women rage day in Dresden, which will most likely be followed up by a Women rage Club there. I'm right now creating the flyer and will send it to you for feedback and coaching.

I'm thrilled by this work and what it changes in people!

I feel joy because today while holding space I experientially experienced a - very obvious - distinction for the first time: my job as a rage club spaceholder IS to make people uncomfortable (in an empowering way). During a 'saying no' practice, a client wasn't receiving any beeps because she was really "good" at landing her NO's. After giving her a couple of GO's, my fear was telling me I'm not doing my job correctly. I realized that my job is not to say Bravo, my job is to find the next scary step for her to take, because this is the value she is investing in. I proposed that she interrupts the roleplayer with her NOs instead of letting him finish his sentences. She couldn't do it, she lost her voice, her center, her clarity, and we worked on it! It was "uncomfortable" and she thanked me for it. Amazing! I love making people uncomfortable when it's not for my gremlin's ugly purposes, it's extremely High Level Fun! Especially when people appreciate it. Of course it will be different when they hate me for it, but that's a story for another time.

This stuff can't be planned, or imagined, or anything really, there is so much learning that happens from doing.

I said this last time, but I get 3 times and then it's rescuing: if you're delaying your spaceholding, dooooo iiiiiitttttt, you'll never be ready!